Abby Berg

In Abby’s spare time, she likes to: On Saturday mornings, I like to hop the freight train in Queen’s borough and travel to New Westminster where I jump off at the New West Quay. Then I sit outside the café in the rain and drink ethically grown coffee while unsmilingly contemplating serious socio political issues as I chain smoke More 120’s extra long cigarettes and watch tug boats on the Fraser River until my friends arrive.

When it’s raining I work on a screenplay about Urban Exploring.

Sue suggested I practice smiling and talking loudly…I do this in my head while riding the bus. In my fantasy I smile at my bus mates, make eye contact and read the METRO out loud in my biggest voice. I haven’t made this a reality yet.

After graduating BCIT I expect I’ll be able to use my big reading voice while staring at people on public transit.

If I’m unable to achieve this goal I’m applying for a tuition refund using Mr Kipling’s collection of template letters.

Abby’s biggest influence is: Dr. Laura - she isn’t a real doctor and gives crappy advice. She and I are alike in so many ways, except I don’t hate queers!

If Abby could see any musician live, it would be: Cheap Old Furry Lewis

Who would win in a fight, Bruce Lee or Chuck Norris? John Cleese cause he’s funnier.

Abby’s favourite food/beverage is: Whiskey sours, Gin, More’s 120 mentholated premium cigarettes.

In 15 years, Abby sees herself: Dead.

I’ll be pretty busy multitasking as I decompose and turn into carbon in the Shady Pines Cemetery.